But we were in Las Vegas the week of the election. California is close by, and it would have been easy enough to take a day trip and get married.
It would not have been recognized in Alabama, but possibly one day it would.
Anyway, in the Houston airport on the way out there I noticed in the Sunday, November 2, New York Times, that 6 of the 30 wedding announcements were for same sex couples (that's 20 %), including a feature article on Max Mutchnick, the creator and executive producer of Will and Grace, and Erik Hyman, an entertainment attorney.
Photo Credit New York Times
In September the two became fathers to daughters Rose and Evan, and decided to get married in California before the vote on Proposition 8. On October 25 the couple vowed their love to each other in a ceremony officiated by Rabbi Lisa Edwards. For a couple living in California, that made perfect sense, as there is a good chance that even with the right to marry being taken away, those already married will get to remain married.
Even though over 22,000 lesbians and gay men have married in California, many have waited to see what the vote on Prop 8 would bring, wanting to make sure their marriage would be permanent before taking the vows.
Some where in that mix my partner and I fall. I mean, there is chance we would have come back married. I won't reveal what our plans were. But for argument's sake, let's say we were planning a West Hollywood wedding and a Vegas Honeymoon, and for whatever reason, we had decided to wait until after the vote to do it.
Tuesday's vote took that option off the table.
A lot of people feel that this is California's problem, but it does not stop there. People from every state have travelled to California to marry, and many in the U. S. looked at the right to marry in that state as the second chapter in a fifty chapter book on marriage equality.
I know that not everyone who reads this agrees that gays and lesbians should have the right to marry. But most would agree that same sex couples should be treated with dignity and afforded the same rights as other couples.
The passage of Prop 8 is not a done deal. The vote itself may have been illegal, as California law requires that measures used to take civil rights away from a group would have to first be passed by the legislature. In other words, you can't vote away people's rights, if that were so, would blacks have achieved equality?
California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger said yesterday on CNN he hopes the State Supreme Court overturns the ban. Of course that would create all kinds of chaos as supporters of Prop 8 would cry foul, but let them cry.
Tens of thousands of protesters marched in Los Angeles and San Diego, as well as Palm Springs and Long Beach over the weekend, and the Mormon Church is taking a lot of heat. They provided half or more of the millions of dollars used to support the ban, and hopefully they will lose their tax exempt status because of it.
It is so odd to me that proponents of same sex marriage are being accused of "changing the definition of marriage" with the argument that you can't change the definition, and the funding to prevent the "change" comes from the group whose definition of marriage has included polygamy and child marriage. WTF?
There is also the issue of strong support for the ban from the African American community in California. Again, how odd, since California led the way in allowing recognition of marriage between the races.
Well, even though the equalization of marriage in California was a huge deal, this is not so huge, because progress marches on. Massachusetts still believes in equality. Connecticut will take up where California left off. New York may soon follow.
Maybe a trip up east will be planned for the not too distant future.